Drama in My Life

Ok, it's time for me to confess :)

Hello, my name is Renata & I'm a Drama Queen ♛ haha

If you've missed what this is about, I'm going through my own coaching framework as my own client & this is the Pillar N2 in my framework. You can read more about it in this post.

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Coming back to what is happening in my life before the work on this Pillar.

Have to say that out of three positions, the position of Victim is the most common for me to find myself in.

I often was catching thoughts in my head like "Poor me" for many reasons, and on various occasions, for instance:

➤ Because I was born in a wrong family, country, time...

➤ Because I don't have enough friends, money, opportunities...

➤ Because I can't do this, that or the other.

➤ My circumstances are always somewhat special & not in my favour.

➤ I can only rely on myself & what I've got, dreaming is pointless...

➤ Etc., etc., etc.

Feeling sorry for myself & not seeing opportunities became the background story of my life. Therefore was really hard to do pretty much anything in life. Even when, to start with, I felt inspired & thought that maybe this time things will work out somehow different.

Only thing they didn't.

It's hard to admit, not gonna lie. But also have to say that the work I've done with the first Pillar helped me to see this one better & actually feel less sorry for myself too :)

Like, for instance, when after a set of meditations, my mind gave up & I couldn't do any work for a while. It happened because it's harder to guide yourself in meditation. Since you are doing the job of the guide & the follower at the same time, mind has more chances to escape into thinking about whatever else...

My mind was tired and was just wondering around, not being to focus on meditation, or even was felling asleep.

Usually I would get very annoyed, Poor Me would tell me all about wasted time & how my idea/project is felling apart... I would usually get stuck in that mindset for a while, if not give up completely. But this time I didn't.

I caughed my Victim position, recognised it and let mysef relax and take my time. At the end of the day it's my project and if not me, who else will do it? hehe

I was off for about three weeks, before I could do another meditation. Can't say it was smooth & perhaps took me longer because I still have Drama in my life :) but nevertheless I'm carrying on & that's what matters.

󠁐#GreatJob

So as I said before & you can see now, first and Second Pillars are connected & affect each other, so I need to make sure I carry on asap with this one. Which I'm on board with now :)

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The main areas of my life, where this position is predominant are:

● Career/success &

● Relationships (friends, family & love ones alike).

Positions of Persecutor & Rescuer are also present in smaller quantities in various areas and situations.

Regardless of the "layout" I suggest to work with all three, because we can't see absolutely everything & if at least one of them is present, you can be sure, the other two will be somewhere nearby.

So I now will be tackling all three positions & will see you on the other side :)

Thank you for staying with me.

Until the next time,

Renata Dar